8.2.1999 Blood in my hands

Is that the world? So bad and messy!
Is it my life I hate?
I don't want to live anymore
Why? well, you love her
but you're so nice to me
I don't know if you like me or if it's
just pity
You don't hate me so I have to!

I take the knife 
I cut my vains
Blood in my hands (blood everywhere)
pain in the heart

Am I dead? Did my dream become true?
I look at my hands and see the blood is gone!
No hectic that I could feel! I've got the endless time!
No hate I feel, just love for my biggest enemy!
That's not me! God speaks to me but I don't listen!
That's not my god! He can't forgive my sins!

I just walk away
I see the knife
My vain is cut
Blood is everywhere
but there's no pain!

I live! My soul was stronger than my body!
I won't die just because of you!
I love you but I should enjoy my life! I've got just this!
Love me... or don't! Respect me although I tried to kill myself!
The reasons I live are the people which love me!

Blood in my hands
Invisible blood 
No pain anywhere